TED talk with Brene Brown – The Power of Vulnerability.
Brown is a qualitative researcher and in her research about connection between people, she found that shame was linked to it. After going further into the research about shame for six years, Brown was still missing something. The people she interviewed could be divided into two categories, those who had a sense of worthiness and those who didn’t. What separated them was that they believed they were worthy. They simply believed. This was the missing piece to Brown’s understanding of shame.
Brown took her data further to another research called the whole-hearted. “The courage to be imperfect, compassion to be kind to themselves first then to others, and connections as a result of authenticity. They fully embraced vulnerability.” These are the similarities she found in between the people who had a sense of worthiness.
Brown became conflicted because through researching she found that the way to live was to “stop controlling and predicting” which is the definition of research. After her “streetfight” against vulnerability for a year, she went back into the data. Spent the next years researching and she learned that people numb vulnerability. When numbing one emotion, that results in numbing everything. Numbing leads to misery that becomes a cycle. We make everything uncertain certain. “I’m right, you’re wrong, shut up.” We perfect, but that doesn’t work. We pretend our actions don’t affect others. This cycle is the cause of numbing.
Instead, what Brown suggests we do is “let ourselves be seen, deeply seen, vulnerably seen. To love with our whole heart even though there’s no guarantee. Practice gratitude and joy in those moments of terror. To believe that we’re enough… Vulnerability is the core of shame and fear and our struggle of worthiness but it appears that it is also the birthplace of joy, of creativity, of belonging, of love.” The entire video concluded that vulnerability is key to happiness even though to get there we will feel fear, shame, and discomfort.
I hear that to become who you are meant to be you must let go of who you think you should be and be vulnerable. I do believe this but I am terrified of being vulnerable. I loved her topic and how she presented it. I just loved the video. I am someone who hates to be vulnerable and this video opened the door, just a little bit. If you want to watch the video the link is below.